A(Fictional) Non functional Resume' of a Desperate Woman

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Ms. Sally Desperation

           1475 Anything Drive

   USA or Any Where Lane 10000

Objective: To find anything or anybody to love me, by any means necessary

Low-lights:  Low Self Esteem, Low Self Worth, Loneliness, issues and Plain old Desperation

Experience

Wearing My Feelings on My Sleeves: Type of Business (Retail) Duties were: Telling a man I met “I love him” although I just met him a week ago, convincing him that I can’t live without him; meanwhile I was living before I met him

Jealousy Heart Hospital: Type of Business (Mental Hospital) Duties were: Wearing seductive, degrading clothing to steal men from innocent women,  but when someone came along with a more sexier body or old age old crept in, guess what….he was gone….. (Because the law of sowing and reaping still works)

Buy Him: Type of Business (Retail) Duties were: Short changed myself to make a man happy…found out later that he was a player…

Handled currency: Although love is not for sale (other than prostitution and escort service) I had to keep him looking good by buying him what he wanted

Abuse: Type of Business (Work at home) Duties were: Receiving verbal, mental and physical domestic violence

Special skills: Could have been treated like a princess but compromised. Settled and allowed maltreatment and sometimes in front of my family, friends, furthermore children. 

  **This is why I believe I am the most qualified for this position**                                                                                   

Education

The University of Black Eye and Disrespect

Masters of a Hard Head Made a Sore behind Degree Received

*Graduated without honor

The College of Broken Hearts and Life Skills

“Didn’t get it from home”

A Street B.A in Life Skills Received

*Graduated at the bottom of class (Skid Row and Hell’s Kitchen)

High School of Hard Knocks and Learn the Hard Way

A General Education in Desperation Received (G.E.D)

References:   7 baby daddies ~ 10 years of Therapy ~ Hospital and Credit Card Bills... But Jesus

Paid It All… With a testimony that will help millions…